Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Back in Style


It has been long. A long time since we last met on this podium. I missed you people. I know you too missed me. But I couldn’t tolerate the sweet sorrow that comes from parting. So I had to take a French leave. I just vamoosed into thin air lest you saw me go. And sobbed. Many people have been asking where I went to. Well, I didn’t die; Men like me don't die. I have been around. Only that I crossed the red line separating Nairobi and Kiambu county and went home.

For a duration of one month, I have been holed in Kikuyu. In a small squirrel hole called Kanyayo. This is after his Excellency VC Magoha evicted us from the varsity. He said that we bore him. That we had overstayed our visit. That some of us were too old to be in campus. He for example pointed out on Serengeti (you remember him) who had a bushy beard and was tarnishing the good image of the varsity with his hair. Because one bad potato spoils the party for the entire sack, the old Magoha chased the whole lot of us. He chased away Munywoki. He chased away Ritho. He chased me away. He chased us all!




Some morons rumoured that I fear Alshabaab so much that I couldn’t dream of staying a minute in Nairobi with them looming. That is trash. Me? I do not fear cowards who only attack at night, do I? No, I am a lethal weapon. Any Alshabaab who dares attack me will be in for a rude shock. I went home to cool off. Nothing much. And there is nothing wrong with a man cooling off, is there? So, I am right in calling those rumour mongers morons. But I do not blame them. They are people who have psychological problems back home and do not know where to vent their frustrations to. Yes, some have erectile dysfunction. Others have fibroids. Come on guys, when you have these problems, see a doctor. Do not say that I fear Alshabaab.


The Performing Arts Director

On getting home, the local Pcea church youths were so hospitable that they had waited for me at the local matatu bus stop. You guys should have seen them. The girls,dancing and ululating in glee while the boys mercilessly swang twigs in the air . I thought my fellow Catholic youths would be the ones to welcome me. But they were nowhere to be seen. Indeed, Jesus was more than right when he said that a prophet is never welcome in his home town.


The same Pcea youths were quick to offer me a job. They were preparing for their annual drama festivals and wanted someone to script write and direct them. Broke as I was,  I quickly accepted the offer. And so for four long and tiring days, I was glued on my seat trying to write a play. Finally the play was over  and  my seat was swollen. I gave them the script.

They started cramming. You should have seen them. All wanted to please me, and so they crammed even what they ought not to cram. I was pleased. And felt lured to be part of their cast. So I earned the name Ahab Kinoru in the play that was staged in Njumbi Parish on 1st June.

The D-Day came. We won. We proceeded. Again, on 7th June during the Kikuyu Presybtery festivals, we won. And earned claps from the entire presybterial congregation. Haturingi.

The next time, we shall be making fools of ourselves on stage is on 27th July at Ruiru Pcea Regional festivals. Now that there is lots of time between now and then, we had to abate rehearsals. So, I am jobless until a week to 27th.

The Pedagogical Inspection Sojourn

Apart from being a Performing Arts Director, I have been a member of a team that has been doing rounds in schools motivating students. We call ourselves the pedagogical inspection sojourn team.  It is made up of four members: Keddie, Vernitter, Vamiti and I. We also have a club patron who is very much concerned about child advocacy. His name is Wammy.

Doing rounds in local schools has shocked us to the roots of our existence. People, our kids are having sex! All the way form kindergarten to class eight. So when you hear that Senator Judith Sijeny is campaigning for kids to be given condoms, research first. Do not be quick to call her nuts. She isn't. All that she is doing is alerting the society that we need to do something about our moral fibre.


squirrel in the choir
The pedagogical inspection sojourn team


squirrel in the choir
During one of our tours at Kamangu Primary School

Nairobi, here I come back

Last week, I felt it cool to come back to Nairobi and see what has been happening when I was away. Well, I see lots of changes. One, Ritho is going bald. Very bald apart from few rumours of hair on his head. It is now right to say that he is folicularly challenged.  Two, Munywoki is becoming more digitalized. Daily, he is surprising us with new softwares and applications. The last time I checked, he was designing a website for St. Jude Donholm. This week, he was working on an event DVD. the other day, he programmed an application that can send bulk text messages by the click of a button. Kudos Munywoki, the sky is the limit.
And now that my friend Munywoki is doing software business, do contact him via 0718 801590 for any of your technological needs.

My Nairobi neighbour Wanini is also in a small business. She designs bead mats, wrist bands and baskets for sale.Once she is through with this job, she then calls me to online market for her. They are beautiful hand-crafted articles that would accentuate the beauty of your house.I will soon be posting her works either on my FB page or here. Have a good day friends.




3 comments:

  1. Mmmh...so inspiring how you are getting settled out thea. happy for u bean James Njenga ;-)

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  2. mmmmh waaw great welcome to Nairobi sabasaba is also here

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  3. Am a follower of your work man. Happy at last there is a place i can get them

    ReplyDelete